/**
 * @package Akismet
 */
/*
Plugin Name: Akismet
Plugin URI: http://akismet.com/
Description: Used by millions, Akismet is quite possibly the best way in the world to <strong>protect your blog from comment and trackback spam</strong>. It keeps your site protected from spam even while you sleep. To get started: 1) Click the "Activate" link to the left of this description, 2) <a href="http://akismet.com/get/?return=true">Sign up for an Akismet API key</a>, and 3) Go to your <a href="plugins.php?page=akismet-key-config">Akismet configuration</a> page, and save your API key.
Version: 2.5.3
Author: Automattic
Author URI: http://automattic.com/wordpress-plugins/
License: GPLv2 or later
*/

/*
This program is free software; you can redistribute it and/or
modify it under the terms of the GNU General Public License
as published by the Free Software Foundation; either version 2
of the License, or (at your option) any later version.

This program is distributed in the hope that it will be useful,
but WITHOUT ANY WARRANTY; without even the implied warranty of
MERCHANTABILITY or FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE.  See the
GNU General Public License for more details.

You should have received a copy of the GNU General Public License
along with this program; if not, write to the Free Software
Foundation, Inc., 51 Franklin Street, Fifth Floor, Boston, MA  02110-1301, USA.
*/

define('AKISMET_VERSION', '2.5.3');
define('AKISMET_PLUGIN_URL', plugin_dir_url( __FILE__ ));

/** If you hardcode a WP.com API key here, all key config screens will be hidden */
if ( defined('WPCOM_API_KEY') )
	$wpcom_api_key = constant('WPCOM_API_KEY');
else
	$wpcom_api_key = '';

// Make sure we don't expose any info if called directly
if ( !function_exists( 'add_action' ) ) {
	echo "Hi there!  I'm just a plugin, not much I can do when called directly.";
	exit;
}

if ( isset($wp_db_version) && $wp_db_version <= 9872 )
	include_once dirname( __FILE__ ) . '/legacy.php';

include_once dirname( __FILE__ ) . '/widget.php';

if ( is_admin() )
	require_once dirname( __FILE__ ) . '/admin.php';

function akismet_init() {
	global $wpcom_api_key, $akismet_api_host, $akismet_api_port;

	if ( $wpcom_api_key )
		$akismet_api_host = $wpcom_api_key . '.rest.akismet.com';
	else
		$akismet_api_host = get_option('wordpress_api_key') . '.rest.akismet.com';

	$akismet_api_port = 80;
}
add_action('init', 'akismet_init');

function akismet_get_key() {
	global $wpcom_api_key;
	if ( !empty($wpcom_api_key) )
		return $wpcom_api_key;
	return get_option('wordpress_api_key');
}

function akismet_verify_key( $key, $ip = null ) {
	global $akismet_api_host, $akismet_api_port, $wpcom_api_key;
	$blog = urlencode( get_option('home') );
	if ( $wpcom_api_key )
		$key = $wpcom_api_key;
	$response = akismet_http_post("key=$key&blog=$blog", 'rest.akismet.com', '/1.1/verify-key', $akismet_api_port, $ip);
	if ( !is_array($response) || !isset($response[1]) || $response[1] != 'valid' && $response[1] != 'invalid' )
		return 'failed';
	return $response[1];
}

// if we're in debug or test modes, use a reduced service level so as not to polute training or stats data
function akismet_test_mode() {
	if ( defined('AKISMET_TEST_MODE') && AKISMET_TEST_MODE )
		return true;
	return false;
}

// return a comma-separated list of role names for the given user
function akismet_get_user_roles($user_id ) {
	$roles = false;
	
	if ( !class_exists('WP_User') )
		return false;
	
	if ( $user_id > 0 ) {
		$comment_user = new WP_User($user_id);
		if ( isset($comment_user->roles) )
			$roles = join(',', $comment_user->roles);
	}

	if ( is_multisite() && is_super_admin( $user_id ) ) {
		if ( empty( $roles ) ) {
			$roles = 'super_admin';
		} else {
			$comment_user->roles[] = 'super_admin';
			$roles = join( ',', $comment_user->roles );
		}
	}

	return $roles;
}

// Returns array with headers in $response[0] and body in $response[1]
function akismet_http_post($request, $host, $path, $port = 80, $ip=null) {
	global $wp_version;

	$akismet_ua = "WordPress/{$wp_version} | ";
	$akismet_ua .= 'Akismet/' . constant( 'AKISMET_VERSION' );

	$content_length = strlen( $request );

	$http_host = $host;
	// use a specific IP if provided
	// needed by akismet_check_server_connectivity()
	if ( $ip && long2ip( ip2long( $ip ) ) ) {
		$http_host = $ip;
	} else {
		$http_host = $host;
	}
	
	// use the WP HTTP class if it is available
	if ( function_exists( 'wp_remote_post' ) ) {
		$http_args = array(
			'body'			=> $request,
			'headers'		=> array(
				'Content-Type'	=> 'application/x-www-form-urlencoded; ' .
									'charset=' . get_option( 'blog_charset' ),
				'Host'			=> $host,
				'User-Agent'	=> $akismet_ua
			),
			'httpversion'	=> '1.0',
			'timeout'		=> 15
		);
		$akismet_url = "http://{$http_host}{$path}";
		$response = wp_remote_post( $akismet_url, $http_args );
		if ( is_wp_error( $response ) )
			return '';

		return array( $response['headers'], $response['body'] );
	} else {
		$http_request  = "POST $path HTTP/1.0\r\n";
		$http_request .= "Host: $host\r\n";
		$http_request .= 'Content-Type: application/x-www-form-urlencoded; charset=' . get_option('blog_charset') . "\r\n";
		$http_request .= "Content-Length: {$content_length}\r\n";
		$http_request .= "User-Agent: {$akismet_ua}\r\n";
		$http_request .= "\r\n";
		$http_request .= $request;
		
		$response = '';
		if( false != ( $fs = @fsockopen( $http_host, $port, $errno, $errstr, 10 ) ) ) {
			fwrite( $fs, $http_request );

			while ( !feof( $fs ) )
				$response .= fgets( $fs, 1160 ); // One TCP-IP packet
			fclose( $fs );
			$response = explode( "\r\n\r\n", $response, 2 );
		}
		return $response;
	}
}

// filter handler used to return a spam result to pre_comment_approved
function akismet_result_spam( $approved ) {
	// bump the counter here instead of when the filter is added to reduce the possibility of overcounting
	if ( $incr = apply_filters('akismet_spam_count_incr', 1) )
		update_option( 'akismet_spam_count', get_option('akismet_spam_count') + $incr );
	// this is a one-shot deal
	remove_filter( 'pre_comment_approved', 'akismet_result_spam' );
	return 'spam';
}

function akismet_result_hold( $approved ) {
	// once only
	remove_filter( 'pre_comment_approved', 'akismet_result_hold' );
	return '0';
}

// how many approved comments does this author have?
function akismet_get_user_comments_approved( $user_id, $comment_author_email, $comment_author, $comment_author_url ) {
	global $wpdb;
	
	if ( !empty($user_id) )
		return $wpdb->get_var( $wpdb->prepare( "SELECT COUNT(*) FROM $wpdb->comments WHERE user_id = %d AND comment_approved = 1", $user_id ) );
		
	if ( !empty($comment_author_email) )
		return $wpdb->get_var( $wpdb->prepare( "SELECT COUNT(*) FROM $wpdb->comments WHERE comment_author_email = %s AND comment_author = %s AND comment_author_url = %s AND comment_approved = 1", $comment_author_email, $comment_author, $comment_author_url ) );
		
	return 0;
}

function akismet_microtime() {
	$mtime = explode( ' ', microtime() );
	return $mtime[1] + $mtime[0];
}

// log an event for a given comment, storing it in comment_meta
function akismet_update_comment_history( $comment_id, $message, $event=null ) {
	global $current_user;

	// failsafe for old WP versions
	if ( !function_exists('add_comment_meta') )
		return false;
	
	$user = '';
	if ( is_object($current_user) && isset($current_user->user_login) )
		$user = $current_user->user_login;

	$event = array(
		'time' => akismet_microtime(),
		'message' => $message,
		'event' => $event,
		'user' => $user,
	);

	// $unique = false so as to allow multiple values per comment
	$r = add_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_history', $event, false );
}

// get the full comment history for a given comment, as an array in reverse chronological order
function akismet_get_comment_history( $comment_id ) {
	
	// failsafe for old WP versions
	if ( !function_exists('add_comment_meta') )
		return false;

	$history = get_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_history', false );
	usort( $history, 'akismet_cmp_time' );
	return $history;
}

function akismet_cmp_time( $a, $b ) {
	return $a['time'] > $b['time'] ? -1 : 1;
}

// this fires on wp_insert_comment.  we can't update comment_meta when akismet_auto_check_comment() runs
// because we don't know the comment ID at that point.
function akismet_auto_check_update_meta( $id, $comment ) {
	global $akismet_last_comment;

	// failsafe for old WP versions
	if ( !function_exists('add_comment_meta') )
		return false;

	// wp_insert_comment() might be called in other contexts, so make sure this is the same comment
	// as was checked by akismet_auto_check_comment
	if ( is_object($comment) && !empty($akismet_last_comment) && is_array($akismet_last_comment) ) {
		if ( intval($akismet_last_comment['comment_post_ID']) == intval($comment->comment_post_ID)
			&& $akismet_last_comment['comment_author'] == $comment->comment_author
			&& $akismet_last_comment['comment_author_email'] == $comment->comment_author_email ) {
				// normal result: true or false
				if ( $akismet_last_comment['akismet_result'] == 'true' ) {
					update_comment_meta( $comment->comment_ID, 'akismet_result', 'true' );
					akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, __('Akismet caught this comment as spam'), 'check-spam' );
					if ( $comment->comment_approved != 'spam' )
						akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, sprintf( __('Comment status was changed to %s'), $comment->comment_approved), 'status-changed'.$comment->comment_approved );
				} elseif ( $akismet_last_comment['akismet_result'] == 'false' ) {
					update_comment_meta( $comment->comment_ID, 'akismet_result', 'false' );
					akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, __('Akismet cleared this comment'), 'check-ham' );
					if ( $comment->comment_approved == 'spam' ) {
						if ( wp_blacklist_check($comment->comment_author, $comment->comment_author_email, $comment->comment_author_url, $comment->comment_content, $comment->comment_author_IP, $comment->comment_agent) )
							akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, __('Comment was caught by wp_blacklist_check'), 'wp-blacklisted' );
						else
							akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, sprintf( __('Comment status was changed to %s'), $comment->comment_approved), 'status-changed-'.$comment->comment_approved );
					}
				// abnormal result: error
				} else {
					update_comment_meta( $comment->comment_ID, 'akismet_error', time() );
					akismet_update_comment_history( $comment->comment_ID, sprintf( __('Akismet was unable to check this comment (response: %s), will automatically retry again later.'), $akismet_last_comment['akismet_result']), 'check-error' );
				}
				
				// record the complete original data as submitted for checking
				if ( isset($akismet_last_comment['comment_as_submitted']) )
					update_comment_meta( $comment->comment_ID, 'akismet_as_submitted', $akismet_last_comment['comment_as_submitted'] );
		}
	}
}

add_action( 'wp_insert_comment', 'akismet_auto_check_update_meta', 10, 2 );


function akismet_auto_check_comment( $commentdata ) {
	global $akismet_api_host, $akismet_api_port, $akismet_last_comment;

	$comment = $commentdata;
	$comment['user_ip']    = $_SERVER['REMOTE_ADDR'];
	$comment['user_agent'] = $_SERVER['HTTP_USER_AGENT'];
	$comment['referrer']   = $_SERVER['HTTP_REFERER'];
	$comment['blog']       = get_option('home');
	$comment['blog_lang']  = get_locale();
	$comment['blog_charset'] = get_option('blog_charset');
	$comment['permalink']  = get_permalink($comment['comment_post_ID']);
	
	$comment['user_role'] = akismet_get_user_roles($comment['user_ID']);

	$akismet_nonce_option = apply_filters( 'akismet_comment_nonce', get_option( 'akismet_comment_nonce' ) );
	$comment['akismet_comment_nonce'] = 'inactive';
	if ( $akismet_nonce_option == 'true' || $akismet_nonce_option == '' ) {
		$comment['akismet_comment_nonce'] = 'failed';
		if ( isset( $_POST['akismet_comment_nonce'] ) && wp_verify_nonce( $_POST['akismet_comment_nonce'], 'akismet_comment_nonce_' . $comment['comment_post_ID'] ) )
			$comment['akismet_comment_nonce'] = 'passed';

		// comment reply in wp-admin
		if ( isset( $_POST['_ajax_nonce-replyto-comment'] ) && check_ajax_referer( 'replyto-comment', '_ajax_nonce-replyto-comment' ) )
			$comment['akismet_comment_nonce'] = 'passed';

	}

	if ( akismet_test_mode() )
		$comment['is_test'] = 'true';
		
	foreach ($_POST as $key => $value ) {
		if ( is_string($value) )
			$comment["POST_{$key}"] = $value;
	}

	$ignore = array( 'HTTP_COOKIE', 'HTTP_COOKIE2', 'PHP_AUTH_PW' );

	foreach ( $_SERVER as $key => $value ) {
		if ( !in_array( $key, $ignore ) && is_string($value) )
			$comment["$key"] = $value;
		else
			$comment["$key"] = '';
	}

	$query_string = '';
	foreach ( $comment as $key => $data )
		$query_string .= $key . '=' . urlencode( stripslashes($data) ) . '&';
		
	$commentdata['comment_as_submitted'] = $comment;

	$response = akismet_http_post($query_string, $akismet_api_host, '/1.1/comment-check', $akismet_api_port);
	$commentdata['akismet_result'] = $response[1];
	if ( 'true' == $response[1] ) {
		// akismet_spam_count will be incremented later by akismet_result_spam()
		add_filter('pre_comment_approved', 'akismet_result_spam');

		do_action( 'akismet_spam_caught' );

		$post = get_post( $comment['comment_post_ID'] );
		$last_updated = strtotime( $post->post_modified_gmt );
		$diff = time() - $last_updated;
		$diff = $diff / 86400;
		
		if ( $post->post_type == 'post' && $diff > 30 && get_option( 'akismet_discard_month' ) == 'true' && empty($comment['user_ID']) ) {
			// akismet_result_spam() won't be called so bump the counter here
			if ( $incr = apply_filters('akismet_spam_count_incr', 1) )
				update_option( 'akismet_spam_count', get_option('akismet_spam_count') + $incr );
			wp_redirect( $_SERVER['HTTP_REFERER'] );
			die();
		}
	}
	
	// if the response is neither true nor false, hold the comment for moderation and schedule a recheck
	if ( 'true' != $response[1] && 'false' != $response[1] ) {
		add_filter('pre_comment_approved', 'akismet_result_hold');
		wp_schedule_single_event( time() + 1200, 'akismet_schedule_cron_recheck' );
	}
	
	if ( function_exists('wp_next_scheduled') && function_exists('wp_schedule_event') ) {
		// WP 2.1+: delete old comments daily
		if ( !wp_next_scheduled('akismet_scheduled_delete') )
			wp_schedule_event(time(), 'daily', 'akismet_scheduled_delete');
	} elseif ( (mt_rand(1, 10) == 3) ) {
		// WP 2.0: run this one time in ten
		akismet_delete_old();
	}
	$akismet_last_comment = $commentdata;
	return $commentdata;
}

add_action('preprocess_comment', 'akismet_auto_check_comment', 1);

function akismet_delete_old() {
	global $wpdb;
	$now_gmt = current_time('mysql', 1);
	$comment_ids = $wpdb->get_col("SELECT comment_id FROM $wpdb->comments WHERE DATE_SUB('$now_gmt', INTERVAL 15 DAY) > comment_date_gmt AND comment_approved = 'spam'");
	if ( empty( $comment_ids ) )
		return;
		
	$comma_comment_ids = implode( ', ', array_map('intval', $comment_ids) );

	do_action( 'delete_comment', $comment_ids );
	$wpdb->query("DELETE FROM $wpdb->comments WHERE comment_id IN ( $comma_comment_ids )");
	$wpdb->query("DELETE FROM $wpdb->commentmeta WHERE comment_id IN ( $comma_comment_ids )");
	clean_comment_cache( $comment_ids );
	$n = mt_rand(1, 5000);
	if ( apply_filters('akismet_optimize_table', ($n == 11)) ) // lucky number
		$wpdb->query("OPTIMIZE TABLE $wpdb->comments");

}

add_action('akismet_scheduled_delete', 'akismet_delete_old');

function akismet_check_db_comment( $id, $recheck_reason = 'recheck_queue' ) {
    global $wpdb, $akismet_api_host, $akismet_api_port;

    $id = (int) $id;
    $c = $wpdb->get_row( "SELECT * FROM $wpdb->comments WHERE comment_ID = '$id'", ARRAY_A );
    if ( !$c )
        return;

    $c['user_ip']    = $c['comment_author_IP'];
    $c['user_agent'] = $c['comment_agent'];
    $c['referrer']   = '';
    $c['blog']       = get_option('home');
    $c['blog_lang']  = get_locale();
    $c['blog_charset'] = get_option('blog_charset');
    $c['permalink']  = get_permalink($c['comment_post_ID']);
    $id = $c['comment_ID'];
	if ( akismet_test_mode() )
		$c['is_test'] = 'true';
	$c['recheck_reason'] = $recheck_reason;

    $query_string = '';
    foreach ( $c as $key => $data )
    $query_string .= $key . '=' . urlencode( stripslashes($data) ) . '&';

    $response = akismet_http_post($query_string, $akismet_api_host, '/1.1/comment-check', $akismet_api_port);
    return $response[1];
}

function akismet_cron_recheck() {
	global $wpdb;

	delete_option('akismet_available_servers');

	$comment_errors = $wpdb->get_col( "
		SELECT comment_id
		FROM {$wpdb->prefix}commentmeta
		WHERE meta_key = 'akismet_error'
		LIMIT 100
	" );
	
	foreach ( (array) $comment_errors as $comment_id ) {
		// if the comment no longer exists, remove the meta entry from the queue to avoid getting stuck
		if ( !get_comment( $comment_id ) ) {
			delete_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_error' );
			continue;
		}
		
		add_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_rechecking', true );
		$status = akismet_check_db_comment( $comment_id, 'retry' );

		$msg = '';
		if ( $status == 'true' ) {
			$msg = __( 'Akismet caught this comment as spam during an automatic retry.' );
		} elseif ( $status == 'false' ) {
			$msg = __( 'Akismet cleared this comment during an automatic retry.' );
		}
		
		// If we got back a legit response then update the comment history
		// other wise just bail now and try again later.  No point in
		// re-trying all the comments once we hit one failure.
		if ( !empty( $msg ) ) {
			delete_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_error' );
			akismet_update_comment_history( $comment_id, $msg, 'cron-retry' );
			update_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_result', $status );
			// make sure the comment status is still pending.  if it isn't, that means the user has already moved it elsewhere.
			$comment = get_comment( $comment_id );
			if ( $comment && 'unapproved' == wp_get_comment_status( $comment_id ) ) {
				if ( $status == 'true' ) {
					wp_spam_comment( $comment_id );
				} elseif ( $status == 'false' ) {
					// comment is good, but it's still in the pending queue.  depending on the moderation settings
					// we may need to change it to approved.
					if ( check_comment($comment->comment_author, $comment->comment_author_email, $comment->comment_author_url, $comment->comment_content, $comment->comment_author_IP, $comment->comment_agent, $comment->comment_type) )
						wp_set_comment_status( $comment_id, 1 );
				}
			}
		} else {
			delete_comment_meta( $comment_id, 'akismet_rechecking' );
			wp_schedule_single_event( time() + 1200, 'akismet_schedule_cron_recheck' );
			return;
		}
	}
	
	$remaining = $wpdb->get_var( $wpdb->prepare( "SELECT COUNT(*) FROM $wpdb->commentmeta WHERE meta_key = 'akismet_error'" ) );
	if ( $remaining && !wp_next_scheduled('akismet_schedule_cron_recheck') ) {
		wp_schedule_single_event( time() + 1200, 'akismet_schedule_cron_recheck' );
	}
}
add_action( 'akismet_schedule_cron_recheck', 'akismet_cron_recheck' );

function akismet_add_comment_nonce( $post_id ) {
	echo '<p style="display: none;">';
	wp_nonce_field( 'akismet_comment_nonce_' . $post_id, 'akismet_comment_nonce', FALSE );
	echo '</p>';
}

$akismet_comment_nonce_option = apply_filters( 'akismet_comment_nonce', get_option( 'akismet_comment_nonce' ) );

if ( $akismet_comment_nonce_option == 'true' || $akismet_comment_nonce_option == '' )
	add_action( 'comment_form', 'akismet_add_comment_nonce' );

if ( '3.0.5' == $wp_version ) { 
	remove_filter( 'comment_text', 'wp_kses_data' ); 
	if ( is_admin() ) 
		add_filter( 'comment_text', 'wp_kses_post' ); 
}
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 	   	  		<h2 class="pagetitle">Archive for the &#8216;books&#8217; Category</h2>
 	  

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				<div class="post-49 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-books category-random-rambling">
				<h3 id="post-49"><a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/49" rel="bookmark" title="Permanent Link to a fraud">a fraud</a></h3>
				<small>Wednesday, July 4th, 2007</small>

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					<p><img src="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/416s1fcg6al_aa240_-1.thumbnail.jpg" title="The Great Gatsby" alt="The Great Gatsby" align="left" border="0" hspace="0" vspace="8" />This was a quick read. Starting sometime on an easy-going Saturday and finishing during a lazy Sunday morning. The language is as captivating for me as that of Waugh (and his prose is a pure delight for me to read!). And even though I find the very English Brideshead more captivating and closer to my own skin I think I saw for the first time the charm of the very American Long Island in Fitzgerald&#8217;s story.</p>
<p>I knew that with shutting of the covers, after finishing the last page I will not loose the feeling of sadness. Here is a story of a fraud. The great life-excuse: love, is not sufficient and the story does not end happily ever after. Here is a story of a solitary pursuit of a dream which vanishes upon closer inspection. The dream is too much of an illusion to survive the reality check. And the Great Gatsby sells his identity to become, or rather to pretend he is, someone who will win the prize. And hence the impossible choice: either he is not himself, he acts, and then cannot get close enough, real enough, to win and enjoy the prize. Or he stretches out his hand for the prize, but then he cannot keep his mask on and is disqualified. An impossible choice. A loose-loose situation.</p>
<p>What a privilege it is to be true to oneself.</p>
<p>F Scott Fitzgerald <em>The Great Gatsby</em></p>
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				<p class="postmetadata"> Posted in <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/books" title="View all posts in books" rel="category tag">books</a>, <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/random-rambling" title="View all posts in random rambling" rel="category tag">random rambling</a> |   <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/49#comments" title="Comment on a fraud">1 Comment &#187;</a></p>

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				<div class="post-39 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-books category-random-rambling">
				<h3 id="post-39"><a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/39" rel="bookmark" title="Permanent Link to taken, blessed, broken and given">taken, blessed, broken and given</a></h3>
				<small>Saturday, May 26th, 2007</small>

				<div class="entry">
					<p><img src="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/lifeofthebeloved.jpg" title="Life of the Beloved" alt="Life of the Beloved" align="right" border="0" hspace="8" vspace="8" />Few evenings ago I read, more less in one sitting, a book that Henryk recommended to me long time ago. <em>Life of the Beloved</em> by Henri Nouwen. The genesis of the book is in itself a story; a story of a remarkable friendship between a catholic priest and a secular jew. The challenge that birthed the text was posed by Fred: write about the faith in a way that would be relevant and communicative for secular (&#8216;unchurched&#8217;)  New Yorkers.</p>
<p>Nouwen starts in a very similar place where Kenny Borthwick (thanks to David for this introduction) starts one of his talks: who we are in God&#8217;s eyes. The very basis, indisputable fabric of our identity. Kenny talks about unconditional father-love, Nouwen about being chosen, blessed. Nouwen uses the wonderful symbolism of eucharist &#8211; the bread and wine are taken, blessed, broken/shed and then given. And through these symbols we can observe and talk about our own life.</p>
<p>When I read this text I was ever so powerfully reminded of both how difficult it is for us, for me, to grasp and accept this and how utterly transforming this message is. Understanding this makes us revise what we think about suffering (being broken) and living &#8211; it makes us live for others (being given).</p>
<p>Starting with our identity being intimately rooted in the total undeserved unquivering acceptance. Ending with us delighting when we can truly invest, without calculating or hoping for any return, in lives of other people.</p>
<p>Henri J M Nouwen: Life of the Beloved</p>
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				<p class="postmetadata"> Posted in <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/books" title="View all posts in books" rel="category tag">books</a>, <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/random-rambling" title="View all posts in random rambling" rel="category tag">random rambling</a> |   <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/39#respond" title="Comment on taken, blessed, broken and given">No Comments &#187;</a></p>

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				<div class="post-37 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-books">
				<h3 id="post-37"><a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/37" rel="bookmark" title="Permanent Link to close to the dirt of earth">close to the dirt of earth</a></h3>
				<small>Thursday, May 24th, 2007</small>

				<div class="entry">
					<p><img src="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/0099388618.jpg" title="Nights at the Circus" alt="Nights at the Circus" align="left" border="0" hspace="8" vspace="8" />Couple of days ago I have finished reading Angela Carter&#8217;s <em>Nights at the Circus</em>. Despite it being Bella&#8217;s recommendation the book did not delight me, maybe it did entertain. Yes, I am not the greatest fan of magical realism (it is very much hit and miss with me, <em>Satanic Verses </em>being a miss and <em>Ground beneath her feet</em> a hit).</p>
<p>The text is skillful. Which, in truth, I think is damnation rather than praise on my lips. Just like lighting in a theater; when you notice it, something went wrong. The author changes the style and picks and mixes her literary tools. Skillful &#8211; yes. But I am reminded of <em>Kill Bill</em> &#8211; were there too many gadgets to use and the artists could not make their mind up?</p>
<p>This said there were some great passages, so one cannot deny &#8211; she writes well. I was just slightly nauseated. And alongside gripping, ornate paragraphs I found ones that were &#8230; dirty. I don&#8217;t mean that in a prudish way &#8211; rather, they were earthy, made of dust. Reading them brought a shadow of exhaustion (I felt similarly when I read <em>Money</em> by Martin Amis, but to a much lesser extent with Carter&#8217;s text).</p>
<p>Having re-read my opinion I must stress it is exactly that &#8211; my very subjective account of how I received the text. And is far from any balanced view.</p>
<p>Fevvers for me was too heavy of a beast to take off and fly.</p>
<p>Angela Carter: Nights at the Circus</p>
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				<p class="postmetadata"> Posted in <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/books" title="View all posts in books" rel="category tag">books</a> |   <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/37#comments" title="Comment on close to the dirt of earth">1 Comment &#187;</a></p>

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				<div class="post-14 post type-post status-publish format-standard hentry category-books category-random-rambling">
				<h3 id="post-14"><a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/14" rel="bookmark" title="Permanent Link to too much &#8230; a feast of emotions">too much &#8230; a feast of emotions</a></h3>
				<small>Wednesday, April 18th, 2007</small>

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					<p><img src="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/zzeliza21113.jpg" title="By Grand Central Station I sat Down and Wept" alt="By Grand Central Station I sat Down and Wept" align="right" border="0" hspace="6" vspace="6" />Poetic prose is not a genre that I have tasted, sampled much. So not knowing what exactly to expect I have bravely read <em>By Grand Central Station I Sat and Wept.</em> The first two chapters overpower the reader like a most potent scent worn by a glamorous beauty. It is too much, by far. And yet one cannot help but to wish to be in the company of the text (and the beauty). And so locked in this companionship wonder if ever such passion can be encountered, and more, sustained on this side of the text. You see, the protagonist is truly consumed. Is it a hyperbole, or a mark to which we, mere mortals, should aspire?</p>
<p>In line with my somewhat misanthrope nature I was glad that the book was not an exponential involvement and consummation of the joyous love. If it were the story would be a ride into the stratosphere, adorned by beautiful metaphors (and there are many of them!) but leaving the reader in the end high in the air with no way of return but a lonely free-fall. The text however takes the reader down from the heights of exalted passion. Together with the protagonist we descend to a passionate but haunting place.</p>
<p><a href="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/250px-elizabethsmart.jpg" title="Elizabeth Smart"><img src="http://mws.studio282.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/04/250px-elizabethsmart.thumbnail.jpg" title="Elizabeth Smart" alt="Elizabeth Smart" align="right" border="0" hspace="6" vspace="6" /></a>It left me shattered. The closest I could compare this state of exhaustion is with how I felt after watching von Tier&#8217;s <em>Dancer in the Dark</em> with Bjork.</p>
<p>I was also left with a question and an observation: is it truly worth to follow passions to their full depths? (I kept finding myself on the side with &#8216;realists&#8217;, &#8216;people who knew the life better&#8217;,  thus answering &#8216;no&#8217;, but there is a creeping doubt in me about such a measured answer).  The observation was that it is truly a most terrifying the amount of power that a man can hold over a woman, whether he realises it or not.</p>
<p>Elizabeth Smart: By Grand Central Station I Sat and Wept</p>
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				<p class="postmetadata"> Posted in <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/books" title="View all posts in books" rel="category tag">books</a>, <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/category/random-rambling" title="View all posts in random rambling" rel="category tag">random rambling</a> |   <a href="http://mws.studio282.com/archives/14#comments" title="Comment on too much &#8230; a feast of emotions">1 Comment &#187;</a></p>

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